Avery's Campaign Journal

The Campaign In the USA

Oct 5 / 2004

I received a piece of mail from Holly Erskine in Walla Walla, Washington, who says : Dear Avery. I am 9 years old. My mommy and daddy are staunch Conservatives and I have very strong liberal political views that would upset them. Should I tell my parents that I think medical marijuana should be legalized and capital punishment abolished?

Well Holly, if you listen to the pollsters more than your parents, you're not alone: all but a narrow slice of American public school kiddies have strong political views these days. But whether you choose to share your views with your parents is less of a decision than you might think, according to Dr. Manny Axsom, associate professor of psychology at Virginia Tech. "They'll probably know about [your political views] anyway, simply by being around you, feeding you, and giving you baths  -- whether you tell your mommy and daddy explicitly or not," says Axsom.

This is the nature of the child-parent relationship; even martini drinking parents are typically astute enough to pick up on their kid's body language and voice inflections - anything that offers clues about what their rug-rats think and feel.

That doesn't mean, however, that it's unnecessary to talk explicitly about politics; and it doesn't mean you should schedule a political lecture series instead of making them happy by taking ballet. What it does mean is that when your mom or dad asks you about politics, humor them and try and engage them in an intelligent discussion. Sure, all parents are morons... but most mean well -- so give them a chance.

The key to making a political discussion more meaningful is to focus on how you came to adopt your beliefs. For example, instead of lecturing your mom on the importance of electing someone who opposes the death penalty, tell her as simply as possible how you came to hold your opinions. And if she still won't listen and retorts with the lame argument that you're too young to vote, then sneeze in her eye giving her a nasty cold -- or at the very least, the coodies.

Taking an open-minded and accepting approach will pay off in the long run, and will likely get you that extra glass of chocolate milk!

Here are some additional tips on talking about politics with parents:

• Examine your motivations very carefully. If you want to talk to your mommy and daddy about politics just because you want them to agree with you, it's probably not appropriate. Parents can be stubborn. Plying them with alcohol can have mixed effects.
• Dodge certain questions. If you don't want to tell your mommy the answer to certain questions, (such as, "Who told you about al Qaeda?) then lie. Hey, you're a kid. You can still get away with it. What are they going to do? Send you to prison? Ha! If pressed, and you need to say something, a good failsafe is that you heard it in the playground. Be careful of saying you saw it on the Internet as your parents may impose stricter Internet conditions on you . Remember, you're dealing with cagey control freaks who think they remember what it was like to be exactly your age.  And they have issues.   
• Be careful about mixing morality and politics. Your parents are already lost in this maze; don't join them. Sure, they might not understand your rational clarity but just because they're mixed up doesn't mean that you have to be too.
• Don't just talk, listen. I know, I know, when was the last time anyone over 12 said anything of importance? Still, for the time being they are paying for your food and clothes and all the other junk - and you may be surprised and fascinated by what you hear.

Okay gang, that's all for today. But I'm on a roll so keep  your questions  coming. Once the election i s over, I may well start my own advice column. I'm thinking of calling it "Dear Avery" or "Ask the Ant" I don't have anything in stone yet... But I'm open for suggestions.

Oct 4 / 2004
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