"I Think, Therefore I Ant."
October 25
Halloween
Horrors
Bwehahaha!
The clock is ticking on the Halloween costume-buying season. Get this:
According to The National Federation of Retailers 34 percent of all men will
dress up for Halloween. Why? Because men like to dress up but feel they can
only do it once a year. Keep an eye out for the tough burly types in drag.
They’re everywhere!
According to some psychology know-it-all, "Your costume says a lot about
your psychological base. Men who dress up like women do it because they’re
latent. All of them – with no exceptions. And don’t get me started on
gals who dress up like cats. Those ladies have real mental problems.”
Riveting
nonsense to say the least. And in that spirit, listed below are 5 (cough)
manly costume ideas that while not guaranteed to make you the life of the
party, should get you some unusual stares.
18th Century Fop
A classic. A consumer survey by the National Retailers Foperation suggested 18th
Century Fops would again be one of the top costumes this year but that needn't
dissuade individualists from going in this direction; the beauty of this old
reliable lies in its flexibility. There's the tried-and-true fop approach or
the über-scary codpiece wearing fop, or you can just
powder your face and wear a puffy sleeved shirt. The possibilities are
limitless, really.
An
Evil Lawyer
This
one has it all: A power suit, a briefcase, a subpoena… Sure, everyone hates
you, but when they need a guy in a lawyer costume you’ll be the first one
they call. And then you can stick it to them!
Fat
Bat
You
won’t ever fit into a superhero costume so work with what ya got. Hey, you’re
already a parody of yourself so why not dress up as a parody of your
unconscious self.
A
Drunk
The
fall down boozehound is the classic manly Halloween costume that combines not
bathing, getting drunk and wearing that ill-fitting and tacky suit of
yours! It’s a throwback (and
throw up) to a time when real men didn’t bother with shaving, or washing
their faces but instead focused on growing beer bellies and developing boozy
noses. It’s a simple look for a simple minded drunk.
Kim
Jong
All
you need is some grease paint, a fright wig, a blue suit, and funny glasses.
Oh, and a nuclear weapon.
Last Christmas is so 2005...
Only 62 Shopping Days Left Until Xmas!
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the top)
To read all the other mildly exciting editions of
"Avery's Daily Journal" visit
"Avery's Journal Archives"
Meanwhile...
Ten Men Who
Can’t Do Drag
The
Monsters That Tucked Me In
Satan’s New Image
The 12
Strange Faces of Jesus
 Liner
Notes From Bad Albums
Twisted
Toys In The Attic
 Movie
Monsters From Way Back
What
to say in a Job Interview
Journals of Leon
Schlesinger
Powerful
Superwomen
 Top
Ten Books of Summer 2005
Fashion Faux
Pas
Partisan
Broadcast System
(to
the top)
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