"I Think, Therefore I Ant."
June 26
Today’s Featured
Album:
Christian Crusaders with Al Davis
Liner Notes:
Side One:
1.
I’m Not Fat, I’m Full Of Christian Love
2.
Die Sinners Die!
3.
Lie Back & Think of God (I Know I Will)
4.
See You At Church – Or Else
5.
Pregnant Teenagers Burning in Hell (Acoustic Version)
Side Two:
1.
Jesus Saw The Filthy Beggar And He Kept On Walking
2.
Pity The Jews
3.
Powder Blue Pants, Black Shoes, Red Shirt (Ska Version)
4.
Teach Your Children Shame
5.
Do The Hairshirt
When Colombia Records approached me to
record this album, I thought, “These godless heathen record industry types
sicken me to my very core." Then I figured it had to be a sign from God,
because, well, I think everything that happens to me is a sign from God. Our
approach to making this album was novel: We’d write some songs and record
them. And with the money we made we’d buy stuff, like clothes and food. This
was pretty revolutionary thinking back then. A lot of people don’t know this
but “Christian Crusaders” was recorded in about 2 hours. Our producer, I
think his name was Marty, spent the entire session in another room having what
sounded like carnal relations with someone (probably a man). He told us the
record wouldn’t sell. He said we didn’t have a sound anyone would buy. He
insisted we’d be forgotten in no time and that no kid in his right mind
would ever dance to a song called “Do The Hairshirt.” Boy, was he right.
The only satisfaction I can take from this is that I heard he died in a fire a
few years later.
Al Davis (revised liner notes 1984)
Cover photo: Al’s mom. ©
1972 Columbia Records
Your
Horoscope:
Aries:
Mars in your birth sign will give you lots of energy. The hangover coursing
through your body will suck it all up.
Taurus: Everyone has faults. Everyone has failings. Everyone frequently
gets things wrong. “Everyone” should be your nickname.
Gemini:
There is nothing to stop you realizing your dreams except for your innate
pessimism and overall lack of ability and talent.
Cancer: In the road of life – you’re road kill.
Leo: You can be the best. You can be successful. You can be anything
you want to be. But until then, keep working on your daily slogan, “Do you
want fries with that?”
Virgo: Go back to bed.
Libra: Jupiter in your birth sign is opposed by Mars and you have to
listen to them bitch at each other all week.
Scorpio: A decision you once made will return to haunt you: Look for the
headless ghost with your Enron stock.
Sagittarius: You’re the life of the party. You’re the bartender.
Capricorn: Sure you’ve made mistakes, but no matter what others say, the
fact is you’re a human being.
Aquarius: Your plans to neuter the dog at home go awry.
Pisces: Once again you will have to bail a loved one out of jail.
Link Of The Week:
onegoodmove
One Good Move is one great site. You can always
count on Norm Jenson to provide sharp, edgy, and bang-on insights with his
patented and well-delivered shots of wisdom and humour. This is sanity that
hits you where you live. I swing by everyday. You should too. You’ll be a
happier and wiser person for it. And to top it off, he even came up with our
company’s logo: “Babble On Communications – Providing Cultural Artifacts
to the Library of Congress since 2005.”
Thanks Norm.
This Week’s 10
Words-Or-Less Celebrity Summations:
Jaleel
White (aka: Steve Urkel): Still universally
despised
Bat
Boy: Mortally wounded by music critics and
now dead of rabies
Donny Rumsfeld: Completely out and hideous to the eye
(to the top)
To read all the other mildly
exciting editions of "Avery's Daily Journal" visit
"Avery's Journal Archives"
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